Picking a Pediatrician

I’m not sure how many parents out there actually pick a pediatrician before the baby comes, but we didn’t. To be honest, we didn’t know how to do it. We had no idea where t o start or what we would ask the doctor. We waited until the very last moment because the hospital wouldn’t discharge us until we made an appointment with one. Thankfully, a doctor at the hospital made a recommendation, so we went with that.

I called the practice and unfortunately the referred doctor was not available. The receptionist booked us with another doctor that SHE recommended. That was where we made the first mistake. I should have known. I used to work in a physical therapy office where the owner told me to book all new patients with the new PT working with the practice. I fell for that trick thinking the receptionist, whom I’ve never met, was honestly referring me to this amazing doctor who happened to be free. BIG SPOILER ALERT: We no longer book our appointments with him. Let us recap how SB and I finally found the perfect pediatrician for our precious baby… and hopefully this post will help any new parents out there…

Doctor A
Dr. A was who the receptionist recommended. He made a decent first impression. He was a nice guy. He was young, but let’s not assume anything. He could be great with kids! We asked if he had any kids. Nope. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have any experience. I’m sure his residency taught him a lot about babies… Boy, was I wrong because HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO PUT ON A DIAPER. Sure, he could use big words and knew where all the fontanels were located, but he had no clue how to actually handle a baby. That’s when we made an appointment with another doctor within the practice…

Doctor B
Dr. B was the complete opposite of Dr. A. He was old… like, ancient looking old. He slowly walked into the exam room, took a few steps, turned to us and said, “That must be Baby SB” and flashed an awkward smile. He was so old and slow (physically, not mentally,) it was scary watching him examine our baby. He stayed silent the entire time he was poking, prodding, and flipping our precious newborn around. Finally, he put down his stethoscope, calmly placed his hands on the table and told us she is perfectly healthy. We let out a sigh of relief. As we dressed Baby SB, we asked him questions and surprisingly, he was extremely helpful. With age, comes wisdom and experience. It was obvious how knowledgeable he was and his answers were honest and straight forward. None of those wishy washy answers where the doctor doesn’t want to be liable for anything he/she says.

We stayed with Dr. B until the receptionist booked us an appointment with the nurse practitioner. Oh, and one thing Dr. B did that Dr. A didn’t, HE WASHED HIS HANDS BEFORE TOUCHING OUR BABY.

Kerry, the NP
Now, I would have just asked for another appointment to stick with Dr. B, but I have a thing for NPs. I think they’re awesome. They’re like doctors except they actually know how to care for their patients.

When Kerry walked into the exam room, she was so lively and bubbly and just had SO much more energy than Dr. B. She also washed her hands as soon as she walked in. Because she was younger and more energetic, she was able to talk to us and explain what she was doing while she examined Baby SB. We talked, asked questions, and besides checking on Baby SB, she also took the time to ask ME questions, making sure I wasn’t showing symptoms of Post- Partum Depression. See what I mean when I say NPs know how to care for their patients? She shared some personal stories of her own, being a mother of two and all, like how she took her 12 day old baby to a baseball game. She also noticed how together SB and I were as she saw SB holding my hand during the visit. She said it nearly made her tear up seeing both parents here for the baby and how we much we cared for each other. Another thing that made us really connect with Kerry was that she and her husband happened to be about the same age as SB and me when they had their first baby. It was a good connection.

So, now SB and I have our picks. We’re definitely sticking to Dr. B and Kerry. If the receptionist makes an appointment for us for a new doctor, I’ll kindly ask to see either Dr. B or Kerry. We’re set with these two and I just don’t feel like seeing any more different doctors.

I know this post did not address how to go about interviewing doctors to find a pediatrician for a baby before he/she is born, but hopefully this has helped parents at least find a good health care provider when it comes to it. Watch for subtle things like does the doctor wash his hands? When he talks, does he simply say big words to prove he remembers what he learned in medical school or does he actually give you useful information? When he answers your questions, are you satisfied with his response? Do you want someone who is motherly or are you okay with the doctor as long as he knows how to handle a baby? Do you want someone who is chatty and shares personal stories or someone more professional and straight to the point? Just some things to consider so you don’t end up settling with a doctor simply because he was nice.

How Baby SB Came

It started on a Thursday morning. I woke up and went about as usual: got ready, cooked breakfast, and waited for SB to come home so we could have breakfast before he drives me to work. As we ate, I told him that I have a feeling… a funny feeling that I would give birth soon. He asked how soon and I shrugged my shoulders. I had never given birth before so I had no idea how fast things would run. I did have an inkling of a clue that it could be as soon as that weekend, but I didn’t want to say and get SB all excited/worried.

Thursday continued as normal. It wasn’t until 11:30 that night that I noticed something odd. As I woke up in the middle of the night to use to bathroom, I had a bladder slip. Only, it felt a little bit heavier than my usual leak… and there was a tiny bit of color. Did my water just break?!? I never have a bladder slip while sitting up, only when I sneeze or cough. Whatever… I went back to sleep. I wake up every 2-3 hours to pee anyway and if I wake up then and the bed is soaked... well, we know what happened.

Friday morning came and the bed was dry. I guess my water didn’t break. Surely, my water breaking would be more obvious than a tiny leak. On our drive into the city, SB convinced me to call the advice nurse to make sure everything was okay. I called as we got on the bay bridge and the nurse told me to come in to make sure everything is okay. It sounded odd to her that I would lose control of my bladder being young. Also, it seems like a lot of people who work with pregnant mothers believe in mother’s intuition, so when I told her I was feeling different lately she told me to come in for a check up.

Long story short, my water did break. My water broke high up, so only a little bit of fluid was trickling down. And those mild menstrual cramps I was feeling? Yeah, they’re called CONTRACTIONS. FYI for anyone about to experience your first pregnancy. Why don’t they tell you that in the books? The whole time I was waiting for a different feeling but those cramps were the go ahead signal to send my ass to the hospital.

At the hospital, I got completely drugged up and the baby popped out just after midnight. Anyone who goes through a natural birth with no drugs, hats off to you. When the contractions kicked in at full speed, I was begging for pain killers. I had to be given a drug just to calm me down enough to get the epidural. The joy that followed the pain:



Happy New Year, folks! No better way to enter the new year than getting paid to stay home with my loved ones :)

Is being a big sis like being a mom?

My brother and I have an agreement. No friends over until (1) he finds our family's missing digital camera (which was either lost because my mom's memory sucks or stolen by one of his friends) or (2) he gets a job (because he's 21 and has no sense of responsibility.) I don't think it's that much of a deal. He has three ways to get out of it: (1) He can ask his friends about the camera and retrieve it -- if it was stolen (2) Help unpack at the new house and find the missing camera or (3) Go find a part time job.

He failed to do anything and I caught him having friends over our house. Now, what am I suppose to do with him? He broke the rules of our agreement. How in the world am I suppose to get this kid to learn anything?

I figured he is an adult now. And, adults pay rent. So, I told him every day that he has friends over, it will cost him $50. His friends obviously felt the tension and decided they wanted to go home. So, my brother drove them home. In my mom's car. Again, lack of responsibility. I'm sure he doesn't pay for gas and here he is chauffeuring his friends around without a slight hesitation that he is abusing what has been given to him.

Although I know what I'm doing is needed and fair, I have this sick feeling in my gut. No, not from the baby, but from feeling bad about my brother. I know he doesn't have $50 to pay me. I know he's leaving next month to join the Army. But dammit he needs to learn he can't just run away from responsibilities. I know one of the reasons he's going to the Army is because he doesn't want to finish his AA. (No diss what so ever for anyone wanting to join the force or is serving our country. It is a very admirable thing to do, but I know my brother's decision to join was half baked and a cop out.)

Given that money is always tight with our family, I decided to alter the punishment. He's still out driving his friends so I have yet to tell him what I plan on offering him. He has to do chores until he leaves for the Army. That doesn't sound much of a punishment because really, at this age you should be able to do chores without being told to. From now on, he will be responsible for doing ALL of the dishes. This is a big thing because I'm starting to cook now and my little sister is on summer vacation and she loves to bake. If I have to tell him to do the dishes, I will add on extra chores; he should know to do them automatically. If he doesn't do them, that's when I start taking his things. First thing I plan on taking is his computer mouse. He LOVES computer games. And you can bet without his mouse, he won't be playing any of those fancy online shooter/war games.

Now I feel better about the situation, but I did change my original plan of punishment. I am soft. How am I going to handle being a mom? I look forward to all the fun things moms do with their kids, but the ugly stuff? Not so sure how I'll handle it. I guess that's why I have SB there. But I have to be strong for my kid. Otherwise s/he will turn out to be a pushover. And I definitely don't want my kid bullied around.

So, baby, please don't be too mad when I do something that seems unfair to you. Just know I'm doing it for a good reason. Love you lots and can't wait to bring you into this world.

Update: The bro tried to be smart and tried to reason with me that he should just pay mom the money... yeah right like mom would take money from him. So I never gave him the chores option and he paid me the rent.

Anybody still there?

Because I have BIG news to share. I've told many of my family and friends so I think it's okay for me to finally announce this on the internetz...

Lately, Kuya Boss has been worried about me. I took the last three Mondays off. I took the last two off because I went to the doctor's. Then I took Tuesday afternoon off to again go see the doctor. You can imagine why he's concerned. Am I really going to the doctor's or am I just lying to him? If I really am going to the doctor's so often, then what's wrong with me? I finally got a hold of him in private to show him this picture:

Pretty cool, huh?!?!? You can see the head!!!

Yeah, SB and I are pretty stoked. It was unplanned of course. And although our parents are scared shitless for us, we see this as a blessing and can't be any happier. It's like we're on e. Like all the time. Except I get nausea and fatigued very easily. Just kidding.

So now the blog is taking a turn. It's going from chronicling my college years to how I'd get into medical school to documenting my pregnancy. I imagine the pregnancy's going to take over my life and it's probably the only thing I have that's interesting enough to share. Most of my social life revolves around SB and I'm sure all you would get sick to hear about our mushy love life. Also, I want to make sure I remember as much of this as possible and share this other young ladies going through unplanned pregnancies.

Many updates to come. I can't wait.

The Honeymoon Phase

SB and I have been together for nearly a year and five months now. We're in love as much as when it first started.

I was going to use this post to rant a bit about how bitter I think my friends are about love and relationships, but I realized, why waste my time on their negativity? Basically, I asked them about the honeymoon phase of a relationship. I wanted to know how long it usually lasts and to hear about their experiences and get some advice. You know... have girl talk and share stories. But the conversation lasted about 7 seconds. The end.

Luckily, I’ve made new friends. My favorite barista from work saw SB and me kiss and called us cute. She asked how long we’ve been together. I told her almost a year and 5 months now. She smiled and said congratulations. She seems pretty open about things and I’ve seen her husband around before. I asked her about her relationship and about the honeymoon phase. She said it never ends. She and her husband have been together 10 years now and their friends get mad whenever they get drunk and start making out in public (or even when they’re sober, actually.) She gave us little tips, basically to not pick fights over small things because it’s those little things that add up and eventually ruin it. Then I remembered last year. She jokingly recommended doing some role playing when I told her about my birthday trip to Las Vegas. She said we should pretend to be strangers and meet up at a bar. I thought she was a freak, but realized she’s just good at keeping the flame and interest factor high in a relationship. There’s a reason why she’s my favorite.

I have a new colleague at work who I gotten to know better. At dinner last night, I decided to ask her how she and her husband met. The table was too crazy to get the entire story and ask her about her honeymoon phase, but I didn’t need a long explanation. After dinner, the lot of us walked over to an ice cream shop. Half of the group decided they’d rather do more drinking so left and told us to meet them at a bar down the street after we got dessert. There was me, my female colleague, her husband, and the rest of men from our dinner. I stood around the men and talked while we had ice cream. The one couple stood off on their own... standing close to each other... eating ice cream out of the same cup... talking about who knows what, but DAMN did they look so in love. They had known each other for 6 years and the flame looked as bright as ever.

To be honest, I know the answer to the honeymoon phase question. It depends on the couple, but I've been surrounded by such negativity when it comes to my high school friends and talking about relationships. I wanted some reassurance that things aren't as complicated as they make it out to be and I'm so glad to have had witnessed what I did with the barista and my colleague at the ice cream shop.

So one year and five months with SB have gone by and now I can't wait to see what the future holds for us. I don't know how long our relationship will last, especially with the possibility of me going to medical school (interview in Arizona next week!) and how that will change me. College changed me drastically and I have no idea how medical school would shape me and whether or not SB and I will make it through together. But with the rate of how things are going, it looks promising and seeing how others have made it too, I hope the barista is right and that this honeymoon phase never ends.

Is it my turn yet?

From the moment I moved back home, I've been trying to get into medical school. I started studying for the MCAT, I took practice exams, I worked on my personal statement, I wrote letters to professors, doctors, schools, I wrote essays for secondaries... I worked really hard to get here (hence the lack of updates on the blog.)

A colleague of mine who applied to graduate school recently heard back from his top pick. He's in! When I saw him holding a sweater with that school's logo, I looked at him funny... His eyes lit up, "I didn't tell you yet?" Right then I knew he had gotten in and immediately grabbed his hands and started jumping up and down (he's gay by the way and jumped up and down with me.) I was so proud of him.

A friend who is applying to medical school this year with me was having a hard time. I told her it's still not too late to apply to some schools and before you know it, she was granted an interview at one of the schools I had been to. I gave her all the information I could remember from my interview. I gave her details, lots of them. A few weeks later, I get a text. She's in! She deserves it and I am so happy for her.

Another friend of mine just texted me today telling me he has been offered an interview at the school that I am wait listed for. Of course, I couldn't hold out on him and sent him a lengthy email on my personal experience and any advice I could give him. I wish the best for him, but as I watch all of my friends go on to the next chapter of their lives, I'm left here wondering, what about me?

I shouldn't be complaining because the best way for all of this to work out is for me to actually NOT get accepted anywhere this year. You see, because I am wait listed at this school, if I don't get in anywhere this year, they will consider me for early acceptance for the next year. I want the early acceptance for next year. That way, I'll have more time to work, save up money, I'll get to go to the Philippines with SB in November, I get to spend more time with the family... It sounds much more relaxing than getting in last minute and what if all the financial aid is already gone?

But really, I want to keep waiting? I've been waiting for months now and it sucks. What if they decide to NOT let me in next year?!? It's not a sure thing. The wait list/early acceptance plan sounds great and highly possible, but it also sounds just too good to be true. Please let it be true.

My, time has flown!

I'm always telling SB, “Wow, it’s been a while since we’ve last…” Gone out, gone on a vacation, went dancing, got drunk…. Only to realize, it’s only been two weeks since the last said occasion. I obviously have a really bad perception of time.

However, the other weekend we did a first: our first grown up house dinner party. A colleague of mine, whose husband finally had a Saturday night off, invited us over for dinner. (Why you would invite everyone you know over the first free Saturday night your husband has off is beyond me. I would have asked for a whole lot of “me” time instead.) Practically half of the lab showed up. Well only half of the lab was invited because it was a small apartment. She claimed it was small. It was pretty effin’ nice and roomy for a San Francisco apartment if you ask me. But, she did have one valid point for not inviting some people: it definitely is not a suitable place for children to run around.

So there we were… sippin’ on some beer and wine, eating fondue, bruschetta, and mingling with the most diverse group of people I’ve ever a Saturday night with. It was great. It was a totally different scene for us because usually kids my age spend their Saturdays drunk at a bar or grinding on someone at the club. I felt very mature and cultured that night.

I’ve been wanting SB to meet one of my colleague’s significant other. They’re both into physics and when the two hit it off in a conversation, it was quite a turn on to watch my man engage in an intellectual conversation with someone who has a Ph.D. in physics. From Oxford. (Actually the truth is, I’m not 100% sure where he got his Ph.D. BUT, I do know the couple has ties to that university, so for the point I’m trying to make, let’s say he’s an Oxford educated man and SB was practically on his level.)

Dinner itself was tasty. It was a play-off of paella. Dessert was a sweet and creamy crème brulée topped with fresh berries. Someone also brought a thick chocolate cake and a bottle of muscat. (Are you drooling yet?)We wanted to stay late and drive a couple of our colleagues home, but SB only had a few hours of sleep that morning. We left relatively early around midnight and promptly fell asleep as soon as we went to bed. We had a great evening and the best part of it all… no hang over the next morning.